Last week was the anniversary of my birth – my 62nd to be exact – and gloomily it means I have only 8 more summers till I celebrate my 70th. Nevertheless I try to keep in mind Toby Keith’s words “how old would you be if you didn’t know the day you were born”. More importantly, you may ask, what presents did I get!

In my 63rd year I pretty well have everything I need or want, but my daughter (a lateral thinker) came up with a new twist on gift giving. In her hand drawn card she had snuck in a voucher for an hour’s session of – drum roll – Lipo Laser and Ultrasound Cavitation. My first thoughts were WTF!!! Cavitation sounds like something you would get when dead!

My first thoughts were WTF!!!

In fact it is the perfect gift for someone who has a bit too much of something he doesn’t want. In 2017 I made a New Year’s resolution to improve my health. I needed to drop some weight, sort out my diet and curb my drinking. What prodded me in that direction (apart from my doctor) was the fact that 11 of my pub buddies had kicked the bucket in the proceeding 3 years and, due to my lifestyle, I was in danger of making it an even dozen. Prior to 2017 my blood pressure was 150/120 (it is now 130/85); I was diagnosed as pre-diabetic (my last check-up showed a “very healthy glucose level”); Triglycerides had peaked at 4.4 (now 1.3) giving me a 12% chance of a heart attack before 65 (now reduced to 5% before 70).

In 4 years I have gone from a flabby 108kg barfly to a muscular 95kg gym goer. More importantly my body fat percentage has gone from 35% to 29% as my muscularity has increased at the cost of the fat. All positive for my mental health and the way I look and feel.

However there are drawbacks to breaching the 60 year mark. The body starts to show some wear and tear. In my case, since 2017, I have had an ankle reconstruction, knee surgery and disc/nerve problems in my lower back. Apart from the inconvenience, it has lead to more couch potato activities than vigorous fat burning exercise. In my middle years I competed as a Power lifter and feel quite comfortable in the gym lifting weights, so last year, for my 61st, I decided to sign up for a membership and give it another crack. I’m not as mobile or flexible as I once was but am leg pressing 200kg again.

Still, due to weight lifting being an anaerobic activity rather than aerobic I have been unable to burn off the “cuddly” fat. I am a broad shouldered guy but have always been “tubby” due to the fact that I built up good reserves as an over fed kid. The reserves could be life saving in a serious COVID lock down situation, but losing these ever present pockets of stubborn fat has been an impossibility to date. These days I generally only eat twice a day, with the first meal being carb based and the other protein heavy. At my age I reckon I also deserve a few treats now and again as well, and build this into my routine.  After all, it’s about living mindfully and having a Non-Obsessive Way of Eating. Still this does not help my cuddliness. In my younger days it had always been in the back of my mind that I could cure the problem with Liposuction if I was so inclined, and could afford it. But it seems a bit vain at my age to pursue that line now. Besides isn’t that cheating and shouldn’t I just be more disciplined? Yeah right! Ah such is life and opportunities lost.

BUT! Obviously my daughter had picked up on all this somehow and has taken the decision out of my hands with the perfect gift for someone who has a bit too much of something he doesn’t want. On the other hand is it all just a scam and will it only lighten my wallet? After all in the small print it always says “Individual results may vary and there are no guarantees you will experience the same results as others featured in any marketing materials on this site”. Hmmm, looks like I will find out next week – and will let you know!

Click here to read Lipo Laser Spin verse the Scientific Fact (Part II)